Tacking the sail of competition
I was 10 when India announced its one billionth baby- Aastha. The Times of India had dedicated the front page with a few-hour-old baby wrapped in a white cloth. The image of that morning newspaper is firmly etched in my memories. The national news marked the number billion and what it means for a developing country. I was silently celebrating my cereal that I would be fighting for relatively more resources. And, maybe was better positioned by ten years.
THE NEED — I was a straight-A student for most of my school years. I was given medals and certificates tucked somewhere in my parent’s house. And growing up with parents who had promising careers in their niche, competing is in my nature and nurture at this stage of my life. Dismissing the negative connotation here — healthy competition has always been the drive than merely being a part of the rat race.
Dr. Jekyll & Mr. Hyde — Similar to these two fictional characters, competition has a thin membrane that divides the drive to be motivated by factors like excellence, perfection, incremental individual improvements, and the desire to set better standards for life. Negative human triggers include jealousy, envy, greed, resentment, conflated justifications, and often revenge. A human is incomplete without negative emotions, and numerous examples of how channelizing negative experiences have made many successful—from the adverse life stories of Albert Einstein and Vincent Van Gough to Oprah Winfrey as well as many others. While channelizing negative emotions is striking and inspiring. The biggest challenge is not to cultivate them.
Emotions like workouts are a habit.
The colors of competition change with age. 16, I was fighting attention from friends; 20, fighting for the dream job, earning equities, and later in my thirties, competing for my dream house (in the 2022 real estate market). Or maybe something started way back when I was around two, and my parents brought the younger sibling home.
The Constant Fuel: Competing is tedious, and we get into self-imposed competitions. I stagger with the amount of time I spend finding a five-star place for dinner — looking at reviews, finding the dish, making a reservation, taking a car, finding parking, and maybe standing in line. To make sure I have the perfect dinner (for one day). Online shopping has also sucked all my time, constantly looking for that perfect top at an ideal price. I will spend hours at the stores to get the perfect fit and then spend time to get the best deal on unlimited websites.
Competition helps you move forward and often stay updated. When my friend loses a couple of pounds, I check my BMI. When my colleague gets a new haircut, I do check if I am presenting the best version of myself at work. My friends tell me the same when they come to my place. They get an inkling to get their house more organized. These have always helped me stay updated and improve my daily lifestyle. I would categorize this more as learning than enviousness. I do not put on makeup when I see my impeccably dressed colleague, nor do I get myself a new car every time my neighbor drives one in their driveway.
The Ditch: Competition is a double-ended sword, and you can pick your side. Don’t let it be the ditch you can’t get out of. Humans sense jealousy and greed, but the corporate world and societies appreciate healthy competition. I have been the colleague who was extremely jealous of the teammate who got a promotion for successful delivery. I have also been the friend who envied a friend’s entrepreneurial success. None of them has done me any good than being miserable at both ends and missing opportunities for some great relationships.
The Tacking: Let’s leverage competition and keep negative emotions at bay. If someone or something is better than us, we have a maneuvered path to follow and grow. If we are doing better than others, let’s share and inspire. And this, too, can be done without pride and boasting. Healthy competition does not keep others at bay and allows a thriving playground for ‘competition.’
The world needs the torchbearer and the follower. The world also needs to compete to grow. But above all, the world needs more humility for consonance.
